On Second Thought...

OK, I'm back in. I just played through the level where you are first introduced to the new enemy type: the Flood. The Flood appear to be mutated humans and parasites who are much less intelligent than the aliens from the Covenant, but at the same time, twice as strong and fast.

The level where you're introduced to them is absolutely fantastic. It changed the pace absolutely perfectly. The first half of the level is designed to terrify the player. All you see is the carcasses of Covenant scrubs, as well as Earth marines, scattered around the indoor compound. A droning musical score sets the tone of absolute dread as you make your way through the "too quiet" level. Finally, in the deepest section of the building, you meet the Flood and are forced to fight your way back out.

The pacing in this level was as good as it gets. It wasn't too hard (didn't die once!) there was a lot of plot exposition, you get a couple new weapons, and you're introduced to a new enemy.

So just as I was about to give up on this whole game out of boredom and frustration, the designers almost telepathically answered me with this level. But guess what the next level is?

The Library.

Bring it on, yo. I'm ready.

Halfway There...Halo

So I guess I was completely wrong about the length of this game. I've played for about 8 hours now and I just started the 5th mission out of 10. I'm guessing the total time ends up being closer to 15-18 hours, which is unheard of for an FPS these days. Honestly, I think that's too long. People often complain about the brevity of single player campaigns in modern FPS games, but I think the genre lends itself to being on the shorter side. Like, I'm already bored with Halo to be perfectly frank. Yeah, they mix it up and bring you to different locales, but all I'm doing is shooting at the same 4 enemy types in front of different window dressing. Maybe it's just my gaming personality, but I think this is why I never finished this game to begin with, it's too damn long.

Now with the threat of "The Library" that everyone keeps telling me about, I am more hesitant to keep going. I get more frustrated playing FPS games than any other genre when I have to repeat a section over and over - like last night.

There is a section right at the end of the "snow world" stage where you leave a building that opens into a big snowfield. There are a couple hunters roaming around and then there's those damn flying machines and one of those tanks that hurls massive energy balls. You have to drop down to this area where there is a rocket launcher if you want to stand any chance at all against everything. So if you come through to doors quietly, you can melee one of those "OHH ROLL THE DICE" enemies before he jumps on a ghost. Then you jump on the ghost, ride it over to the rocket launcher area, climb out, take out the two flying things, take out the tank, take out the two hunters, take out the gun turret, all while managing other little dudes trying to kill you. This whole process took me about 7 or 8 minutes when I did it perfectly, but the trial and error before that made me want to eat tin foil. Having to do each step over and over again got old REAL quick.

I'm afraid The Library may force me to give up on this game...I await it's stupid difficulty.

Still Playing...Halo

So I've probably put about 4-5 hours into this game so far. Since this game was the flagship launch title for the original Xbox I have been trying to play it from the mindset of someone who had just bought the system and the game. Someone who had made the decision to buy an Xbox rather than a PS2 or a Gamecube. I thought, "If I had made that decision, would I be happy based on playing this game." And the answer is a resounding yes.

The music, the graphics, the cinematic storytelling all lend themselves to the feeling that you have just purchased a system that can kick some serious ass. And barring some flat textures and the lip syncing working more like marionettes than humans, the game still holds up today, nine years after it's release.

I was talking with a friend a lunch today and I said it's remarkable that I didn't even have to think twice about the controls. I jumped right in and it was just as if I was playing a game that was released yesterday. It really speaks to the FPS control blueprint the Bungie team laid out that it's just as easy to play the first Halo as it is to play Modern Warfare 2.

So I just turned off the power on that island thing so I could access that door. Does anyone remember how much longer is left in the game after that?

Next Up: Halo

Halo. The game that brought first person shooters to the masses, and revolutionized the use of the right analog stick is one that I have never beaten. I will tell you all right now - FPS's are probably my least competent genre. I am flat out terrible at all of them, and I play very few. I had both Modern Warfare games just cuz everyone else had them, but I don't have the time to dedicate to be good enough to where I'm not getting destroyed every round. Eventually, I would trade in almost every FPS I had, and barring a few exceptions (XIII, Bioshock, Portal) I generally stay away from them unless there is something really compelling about it.

That being said, I am very excited to play through the first Halo. It's just old enough to make me a little nostalgic, but still part of the modern era of game design. Although if I remember correctly, the game opens with the now outdated  "move the sticks in this direction so you can see what they do". Game designers now assume you know that the left stick moves and the right stick looks around - but that is thanks to Halo, and partially Goldeneye.

So from most reports, Halo is between 6-8 hours for the campaign. I will be playing on Normal - not Legendary or Balls Out or Rape Me Plenty or anything like that. Normal is fine for me.

Also, I must make mention of Chad Warden - who refers to this game as Gaylo. You can watch his idiotic "PS Tiple" fanboy rant here. Watch it to see how he thinks that if a game doesn't have 50 Cent or Fat Joe in their trailer, those games are in fact, "gay shit". And how "true niggas" don't play Halo. But who does play Halo? "Gay niggas."  I suppose I'm not a "true nigga" but, in fact, a "gay nigga". 

Alright, let's hit it. Halo: Combat Evolved for XBOX.

Review: Silent Hill

In 1999 the survival horror genre of video games was just starting to get its footing in the marketplace. Carried by Capcom's popular Resident Evil franchise, the market quickly opened up a nice big slot for games that were designed to scare the hell out of you. Konami decided to jump into the fray with their first attempt at a game in this fledgling genre - Silent Hill. Attempting to differentiate itself a bit from the Resident Evil series, Konami employed a much more cerebral type of horror in Silent Hill. Where Resident Evil would have zombies bursting through doors, Silent Hill would have shadows of enemies and "did I just see that" moments; where Resident Evil would have lots of firepower with characters trained in combat, Silent Hill would have underpowered, normal characters with very little in the way of weapons. Clearly Konami was doing everything they could to distinguish Silent Hill from the competition, but was it successful?

Story
As I mentioned before, the story in Silent Hill is by far the game's greatest asset. It deals with horror and scares in my favorite way - the horror of the mind. Movies like the Shining, Jacob's Ladder and the more recent 1408 use these same types of scares. To get an idea of what it's like to play Silent Hill, watch the scene from the Shining where Jack is in the bar talking to Lloyd. The camera cuts back and you see Jack sitting at the bar by himself, but to him, the liquor in his cup, the man behind the bar and people around him are as real as the stool he's sitting on.

Silent Hill focuses on Harry Mason's search for his daughter, Cheryl. He and Cheryl are on their way to take some time off in Silent Hill when they get in an accident. Harry wakes up behind the wheel and finds his daughter missing. This is Harry's motivation to continue through the horrors awaiting him in the accursed town. As if through an IV drip, you slowly learn little details about the town and the 3 or 4 actual people you meet, but many of the stories conflict with each other - leaving you to wonder "Is what I'm seeing real?"

The locales you visit, including the town itself, shift from a fairly creepy, fog laden environment to a hellish, pitch black nightmare. After every "nightmare" sequence, Harry suddenly wakes up and you're left scratching your head as to what is reality and what is in his imagination. From a design perspective, this works so well. You are controlling Harry and seeing everything he's seeing so you begin to wonder yourself about the things you see on the screen. Are they real? Are you imagining things? And in the end, many details are left hanging, leaving it open to interpretation - which is an excellent tactic when you have a story such as this. For me, one of the true marks of any good piece of horror media is this - are you still scared after you're done watching, reading, playing? With Silent Hill, the answer is a resounding yes.

 "MOMMY!! Can we go to the...um...nevermind..."

One of the other things that the developers did so tactfully was to make the town itself feel alive, as if it was a character in and of itself. Similar to LOST when the characters would refer to "The Island" as if it was someone they knew, characters in this game refer to "The Town" in the same way, but unlike The Island, the town of Silent Hill actually feels alive as you play through it. There was a specific scene toward the end of the game where you're in the "nightmare" version of a theme park. The ground is made of rusted chain link fence, walls are made of flesh, there is a siren blaring in the distance, and then right in front of you is a perfectly clean and operating merry go round. It stands in such sharp contrast to the rest of your environment that you feel like the town is actually taunting you - trying to make you feel like you're slowly losing your mind.

Gameplay
Ninety-five percent of the time, if a game isn't fun to play, it doesn't matter how great anything else is, the game is a lost cause. Silent Hill is not fun to play, but in this rare case, it actually adds to the overall experience.

Pitting someone against the horrors of their mind, is something no protagonist is prepared for - especially a single father who's never fired a gun in his life. Harry frequently misses shots, he swings melee weapons like his eight-year old daughter, and he can sustain very few hits before succumbing to death's sweet release. From the players perspective, this can be INCREDIBLY frustrating, but from the perspective of the overall experience, it fits in perfect harmony with the other elements of the game. You'll quickly learn to favor flight over fight when you starting burning through ammo and health packs. And when you know you're underpowered, it adds a whole extra layer of stress when you turn each corner - as opposed to having a flame thrower and mowing down rows of zombies. That's not scary. It's awesome, but it's not scary.

While some of these clumsy fighting mechanics were clearly intentional, there are others that were unintentional and ended up taking away from the experience.

1. The camera. In maybe the only instance where Silent Hill following the blueprint from Resident Evil, the designers implemented fixed camera angles to allow for "classicly creepy shots". Most times you are able to swing the camera behind Harry, but other than that you have very little control over it. This can get really annoying when you're being attacked by multiple enemies and you can't see any of them. 
2. 2D, or "tank" walking controls. I lied, this is something else they took from Resident Evil. If you're unfamiliar with this type of control set up, it means that pressing up on the d-pad is the only way to make your character walk forward. So if you're used to modern controls where if you want to make your character walk toward you, you would press down, or make him run to the right, pressing right - forget all of that before playing this game. Pressing and holding right on the d-pad will only make Harry spin in a circle - so if you want to make him walk right, you first have to hold right until he's in the direction you want him to face, and then press up to send him on his way. It's not so bad once you get used to it, but it can get really tiresome in tight corners where you have to be precise about where you're walking. 

 Chilton Memorial Hospital: Providing the most terrifying care anyone could ask for.

Outside of the combat there are puzzles. Some of them fall back on the "find strangely shaped key for strangely shaped hole" mechanic, but some are actual noodle scratchers. You're often given very cryptic clues and left to yourself to figure it out. Things like colors, astrological signs, music, and time all call on the players knowledge of things outside of the game. I often had to do a Google search on certain things, or I found myself with a pen and paper jotting down potential solutions to puzzles. The game certainly assumes it's audience is educated when it comes to puzzles and definitely doesn't pander to the masses. They respect your intelligence and let you figure it out on your own without spoon feeding you answers like so many other games.


Stuff I Liked: 

• The story is pitch perfect and the way the environment plays so nicely with it just makes for a much more enjoyable game. 
• The horror! THE HORROR! Seriously, once you get away from the worst voice acting this side of the Mississippi, this game will terrify you, even with it's dated visuals. 
• The puzzles are fantastic. When you figure them out you actually feel smart. 

Stuff I Hated: 

• Clumsy controls can be frustrating at times. 
• One playthrough is relatively short at six hours, but there is incentive to play it again. 
• Just in case you didn't believe me about the voice acting:

In the end, the game is fantastic. The voice acting is just part of the legend of Silent Hill, and if they did an actual HD remake, I don't know if it would be the same without the campiness. In a way, the awkward voice talent kind of added to the suspense. As if these people aren't reacting to the events in a realistic way, almost like lobotomy patients working through a mystery. Likely that was not the intention, but like I said - all part of the legend.

I would definitely recommend this game to a friend. It's available on the PlayStation Network for download, so if you don't have it - pick it up.

Review in Ten Words or Less: 
Solid experience. Scary as hell. Frustrating controls. 

Finished: Silent Hill

I did it.

Final Hour Count: 6:13
Mode: Normal
Ending: "Bad"

An all in all enjoyable experience. Barring the voice acting (so bad...) and the sometimes frustrating camera/walking controls, I was gripped throughout the length of the game. The concept of the story is superb and that was the carrot on the string for me to continue through to the end. I am definitely compelled to play through the entire game again with the offer of one of those 'New Game+' things where you get cool new weapons (Chainsaw!) and access to areas (Police Station!) that were previously inaccessible - but it will have to wait until I finish everything else...

I'll have my full review up in the next couple of days.

Just Started: Silent Hill

So I played up until the first save point a couple nights ago, which is only like 15-20 minutes into the game. But I was quite upset to find that the SD graphics from PS1 look ATROCIOUS on an HDTV. Now I'm not trying to be all elitist rich guy complaining about having an HDTV - believe me, I am extremely grateful for everything I have in my life, but the way the image stretches out, the pixels are all over the place, its hard to make out what is what, and to add a layer of difficulty, there are no 3D controls. Meaning no matter which way the camera is facing, Up is always "walk forward." Even if your character is walking towards the camera, you still press up to walk forward. It's really confusing and frustrating until you get used to it.

Also, I don't remember the voice acting being as bad as it is. One of the first scenes is your character talking to a policewoman about your missing daughter. Now, let's remember exactly what's happened. You were in a car crash, your young daughter is missing in an abandoned town where you're pretty sure you just saw a few demons from hell walking around stabbing you with knives. Do you think you could work up a little more excitement than:

"Hello. Have you seen my daughter?"











"Haven't seen her."

That massive blank space in there represents the uncomfortable, unnatural pauses in conversations in this game. I'm still convinced that I will allow the game to scare me, and in a way, the unnatural voice acting adds a certain layer of creepiness to the whole affair, intentional or not.

I was talking to a friend about this game and we got on the topic of the fog. If you've ever played a Silent Hill game you know that when you're outside, there is the ever present entity of a heavy fog that hangs over the town. Now, this is obviously a deliberate design choice, but it's also a very clever coverup for straggling technology. In the days of PS1 there was something called "pop in" - this is when objects in the distance would appear or "pop in" to the scene unnaturally. This happened because the system couldn't render the objects until they were a certain size. So if you throw a thick blanket of fog over the entire outside world, with a visibility of only 4 or 5 feet in front of you, the problem is eliminated, or at least unnoticeable. Very clever, Konami-san. Very clever.

Up Next: Silent Hill

The Silent Hill series is among my favorites. I started playing the series at SH2 and continued on from there, playing through most of the games, but I quickly found that Silent Hill 1 had become somewhat rare and a bit of collectors item, usually selling for around 50-60 bucks on ebay for a used copy. Then one day I found a brand new, sealed copy in Blockbuster for 10 bucks. I instantly jumped on it, but I never beat it.

I feel like my last save on my memory card was really close to the end, but I'd like to play through it again. Most SH games are only around 6 hours anyway, so it's not too bad.

I'm looking forward to this one. I absolutely adore the Silent Hill games. They are terrifying in a I'm-still-scared-after-I-turn-off-the-TV kind of way. They play with your mind and your anticipation of things unseen. Monsters are replaced by mood music and sound effects in many cases, keeping you on the farthest edge of your seat at all times.

Let's hit it - Silent Hill for PS1.

Review: Castlevania

How does one review such a classic game as Castlevania? It would be like trying to review a Beatles album, or the Godfather today. Everyone already knows the ins and outs of these types of things. I suppose, as will all of my projects, I will try to make it as personal as possible.

I never owned this game as a kid, but I played it a good number of times just from rentals and at friends' houses. But this was the first time I ever saw anything past level two. It really is amazing how scarce the content is in these old games - the programmers made the games so difficult so you would have to practice sections over and over until you got it right, which would artificially inflate the length of the game. This would by no means fly in the modern era of gaming. We nerds expect at least 8 hours of a single player campaign and every second of that better be a new a unique area otherwise we will complain about it on every message board we can find.

But playing this game did not feel like I was being ripped off. I felt as though I was getting better at something as I slowly progressed through. Each boss I killed felt like a fantastic achievement. Now compare this to the 50+ hour Final Fantasy XIII where the sense of accomplishment came not from overcoming a challenge, but just making it through the entire length of the game. Castlevania gave me a true sense of victory when I finally beat it.

Gameplay

Castlevania was made at a time when game design was much simpler. Designers had only two face buttons to work with so it goes without saying that actions were usually limited. But every once in a while, a game would surprise you with the amount of depth that could come from those two simple buttons. Castlevania is one of those games. One button is your whip while the other will make you jump - pretty standard NES controls, but there is a lot there to grab on to.

Jumping is incredibly stiff in this game. Unlike Contra or Ninja Gaiden, once you commit to a jump direction, that's the way you're going. There's no tweaking or moving backwards while you're in the air. This is much more realistic, but much less fun from a gameplay perspective. The loosey goosey style of Contra really let you control the exact spot you were going to land, while Simon Belmont jumps like a stiff robot.

The whipping is where the depth in the controls comes in. It's not apparent when you first start playing, but when you have to start timing your attacks, you'll notice that there is a slight delay from when you press the button and when the whip is flung out in front of you. The designers put in a half second "backswing" on your whip, again making it more realistic: if you were going to whip something, you'd first have to pull it back and then whip it forward. This slight delay really plays into how you approach certain enemies - especially the dual dragon skull heads that shoot fireballs at you. You have to be close enough to attack, but far enough away to hit the fireballs - and you have to time it correctly. It can be incredibly frustrating if you don't understand that the delay exists, but once you do, you'll feel like you are in much more control over the game than if the whip just shot out in front of you.

 

The backswing

Finally, the subweapons really give the game the extra oomph and layer of control and creativity to how you make your way to the man with the D on his grave. There are a good number of these subweapons but the only one you'll really need is the Holy Water. This creates a small fire where it is thrown and anything that touches it is either killed or temporarily stunned. It is insanely useful in boss fights as I've mentioned. The biggest issue with these is the fact that you have to press Up+B to use them. If you are anywhere near a staircase, you will automatically start walking up the stairs instead of throwing your weapon. I'm sure if the designers had an extra button to use, they would have, so you can't really blame them - it's just annoying. 

Enemies and Bosses
There are a good dozen or so enemy models in the game and most of them are pretty well done based on the limitations of the NES hardware. Whipping enemies to kill them felt incredibly satisfying as they poured out against you. There are a couple of standout enemies I want to make mention of:


Level 5 Knights - these guys are a real challenge. They move backwards as you approach them, so to fight them properly (without holy water) you have to jump towards them to gain any ground. At the same time, though, they are throwing axes at you, so you have to time your jumps and attacks just so.

Monkeys - Nothing is more aggravating than those damn monkeys (hunchbacks) they are low to the round, they don't follow a pattern and they are incredibly fast. They also take away a ton of health if they hit you. A nightmare of an enemy.


Effing Medusa Heads - These flying terrors threats don't come from the damage they induce, but rather they exploit a larger issue with the game design: the knock back. Every time an enemy hits you, your character is knocked back a couple feet. This is extremely common in games of that era - even Zelda II had it. These Medusa heads are hard to judge as they fly in a sin wave formation and you never know which direction they'll come from or whether they'll be coming up-down-up or down-up-down. My biggest main game nemesis.

The bane of every gamer's existence

The bosses in the game are pretty generic. They basically just picked antagonists from classic horror movies - Giant Bats, Medusa, Mummies, Frankenstein, The Grim Reaper...none of them have anything to do with Dracula or vampires at all. Why wasn't I fighting Edward Cullen? Or Bill Compton?

As far as the boss's fighting designs go, their difficulty curve explodes after level 3. Levels 4, 5 and 6 are freaking awful and the bosses just get increasingly more and more difficult. My struggle with the Grim Reaper and Dracula are well documented, so I won't go into it here, but they are certainly infuriating. At the same time though I never felt like they were cheap or unfair. When I died, I felt I was the only one to blame. Again, the practice that was required to beat Dracula was well worth it for the sense of achievement I felt when I finally did beat him.

Stuff I Liked

• The music. Everyone praises the music from Castlevania and I will not stray from that consensus. It is awesome. This being one of the first kind of creepy games on the market, the composers managed to really create a epic monster movie atmosphere with the music and sound effects. A tradition that has carried through the series. 
• The difficulty. As I mentioned, I can really appreciate a game that requires practice and patience from the player. Castlevania requires those in spades. 
• The graphics. An early game in the NES library there are certainly better looking games. But in the same vein as the music, they were able to really create a creepy environment with very little horsepower. 
• Infinite Continues and frequent checkpoints. In a game that requires practice, it's nice of them to allow you to do so.  Especially the infinite continues outside of Drac's final chamber.

Stuff I Hated

• The knockback
• The mother effing Grim Reaper
• Stiff controls. 

All in all, the game still holds up. It's challenging, it's exciting, it's atmospheric, it's hard not to love. I would definitely recommend it to a friend. If you don't have it, it's only 5 bucks on Virtual Console, definitely pick it up.

Review in Ten Words or Less
Classic, elegant gameplay. Brutal difficulty.

This video sums up the game very, very well.

  

Finished: Castlevania

I did it.

Final Hour Count: 8:22
Final Item: Holy Water (with x2 modifier obtained from hitting the fireballs from Drac's second form)

Tonight was a good night. We had a nice dinner at a friends house, came home, hung out with the dog and at around 1:45 AM, I had just finished my Bible Blog for the evening. We have off of work tomorrow, so I decided to give Castlevania a quick try. I beat it on the third try.

I got to Dracula's second form with only one hit point left. I started launching the Holy Waters at him and by a sheer stroke of luck, one of the bottles hit his fireballs on its trajectory and one of those fireballs produced a x2 multiplier and I was able to unload all my Holy Waters on him at a quick enough rate to freeze him in place. In case you're wondering, it takes about 45 Holy Waters to kill him, so stock up.

So hooray! Two games down, yo! Here's proof, by the way.

Almost Done...Castlevania

So last night, I made it through the surprisingly short Level 6 and made it to Dracula's chamber. I was very nervous and only had one life left so I died pretty quick. Resenting the fact that I would have to start level 6 over after I had made it through on pretty much just luck the last time, I almost gave up there. Closing my eyes, sighing and resigning to try again, I hit continue and was delighted to find that the game dropped me off right before that final room. So I spent about 90 minutes fighting that stupid fanged bastard over and over. I finally mastered the timing of his first form, but once he drops into the second form, it gets nigh impossible.

I was told by a few friends that I needed to overload him with Holy Waters, but I don't have the speed modifiers so I can only throw one at a time, and he is incredibly strong and incredibly fast. So I really need to figure out his pattern, if he even has one - or make it all the way through level 5 and 6 without dying so I can use my leveled up Holy Water.

We'll see what I can do - The fight continues tonight.

Crap.

So I had forgotten that I lent out Boom Blox to a friend. She returned it to me but also returned the favor by letting me borrow the sequel. Also, when I bought FF XIII, I made a deal with a friend that I would get that game and he would get God of War 3 - then when we both beat our respective games, we'd switch. I had completely forgotten about this. So this morning when I got to work, God of War 3 was sitting on my desk.

Damn it.

Two months ago my reaction to having a new game on my desk would have been to squeal and giggle like a little girl, but today I let out a groan of dread. "More work" my brain thought.

So I've added three more games to the list. Boom Blox, Boom Blox 2 and God of War 3. Although God of War should be a nice treat - I'll make sure to save it to play after a particularly frustrating game. But still - I've only beaten one game so far and now I've added three. One step forward and three steps back. Damn it.

Still Playing...Castlevania

I've spent the last three days mired in Level 5. I played through the level over and over almost always making it to the Grim Reaper and always getting utterly destroyed because of his obscenely difficult, and frankly, rude fighting style. He floats around the screen while miniature sickles fly around randomly with no pattern. They are extremely difficult to hit with the whip and the Grim Reaper seems to have no pattern either, so it cannot be memorized.

After the actual boss, the second hardest part is the hallway leading up to him. There are these knights that take about 10 hits to kill and back away from you as you approach. So you have to jump toward them to gain any ground. While you're worrying whether or not they'll launch an axe at you during your jump, there are also Medusa heads flying all around the screen. Oh. And everything that hits you takes away 1/4 of your health bar. So 4 hits and you're dead. So even if I made it to ol Grimmy, I would really only have 1 or 2 hits left in me.

I finally got frustrated and watched a Youtube video of someone playing through the level and discovered that the Holy Water is a must. It stops the Knights in their tracks. It stops the Grim Reaper in his tracks and even prevents him from summoning the mini sickles if you do it fast enough. But it looked a little cheap - I wanted to do this on my own - just me, my whip and my skills.

That got old mighty quick and I decided to try the Holy Water approach.

I soon realized the inherent challenge in that. The Holy Water is the very first sub-weapon you get in this level and it doesn't appear again after that. So you have to:

1) Not die if you've passed the first check point
2) Avoid touching any other weapons lest you lose your Holy Water
3) Find both Level Up modifiers to make them effective

I was finally able to make it through the entire level without taking a single hit and reached the Grim Reaper with about 75 units of fully maxed out Holy Water. And I shoved every single one of them down his stupid, dead throat.

So even though I didn't kill the Reaper with the whip, I still felt accomplished for getting through the entire level on one life. 

Then I started Level 6. Then I wanted to find the level designer and punch him in the forehead. With a gun.

Up Next: Castlevania

I want a vampire hunter with a short skirt and a long whip. 

Seriously - look how revealing his tunic is.

That's at least rated T for Teen.

So after the slog through the lengthy but relatively easy Final Fantasy XIII, I would like to try the short but difficult Castlevania. I never had this game as a kid, I only rented it a few times. I recently downloaded the game on the Virtual Console for Wii and have given it a few attempts. I have yet to beat the dual Mummy bosses at the end of Level 3 so I have a good bit of practice and work ahead of me. I've also heard that the Grim Reaper boss in this game is an absolute beast.

Wish me luck.

[UPDATE]
So I gave it my first attempt this afternoon and played for about an hour. During that time, I took out the dual Mummies (yes!) and made it all the way to the Grim Reaper - with only one hit point. I died immediately. Something I didn't realize about this game that makes it a LOT easier than I thought it was gonna be: Infinite Continues. Wow, what a treat! Also, since I'm playing on the Wii, I can save state my game and pick up right where I left off.

The adventure continues tomorrow. At the rate I'm going I should be done with this one in a couple of days.  

Review: Final Fantasy XIII

So the first game I've completed in this project may end up being the longest one. Good thing I got it out of the way up front. Overall, I enjoyed Final Fantasy XIII. The story didn't really shine as much as it could have, there were periods of extreme monotony and boredom, and the game felt a bit rushed, but damn it all if this game doesn't have the most exhilarating battle system ever in an RPG. 

The Story
The overarching concept of the main (and really, only) plot line is an interesting and unique one. You have two worlds: Cocoon and Pulse. Cocoon is where our heroes call home and is set up in a typical dystopian, tightly controlled society. Pulse is "the world below". The citizens of Cocoon have been convinced by their government that anything and everything from Pulse is pure evil.

Now there are these god-like machines that make decisions for both Pulse and Cocoon. These things are called fal'Cie. One day a Pulse fal'Cie invades Cocoon and our heroes come into contact with it. And when one comes into contact with a fal'Cie, they are given a "Focus" - basically they are slaves to the fal'Cie and have a very specific task to carry out. If they fail, they are turned into monsters and eventually die. So there is a lot of mystery in the early hours of the game as to what the characters focus actually is. Is it to destroy Cocoon? Is it to destroy Pulse? Is it to be a puppet of the fal'Cie? All are possibilities.

This is what hooked me early on in the game. It's a storyline that is wholly unique to the medium, and one that really hits all the right notes when it comes to story concept. Ultimately, the story doesn't deliver the way you probably want it to with gaping plot holes and unsatisfying conclusions. The biggest payoff is finding out what the little logo on the box art behind FINAL FANTASY XIII means. The way I described it to a friend was this: I felt like I wasn't smart enough to follow the plot of FF12, I felt like I was too smart for the plot of FF13. Really it just feels like they ran out of time to fully develop the story, because they obviously spent a TON of time perfecting the battle system - because it kicks all the ass in the world.

Ugh. Shut up.

The Gameplay
Let me warn you. If you loved the mini games from FF 7 or the card trading from 8 and 9 or Blitzball from 10 - don't expect anything like that in 13. The whole game consists of: cutscene, run straight, battle enemies, run straight, battle boss, cutscene. Rinse. Repeat. So since the story is a bit of a letdown, the battle system really has to carry the game because that is literally all you're doing. And carry the game it does.

So think of it like this. There are six possible roles or jobs that your characters can use. After a few hours, each character will have access to three of the six. The roles are made up like this

Commando (physical attacker)
Ravager (magic attacker)
Sentinel (defender)
Synergist (support magic)
Saboteur (slow, lower enemy defense type spells)
and Medic (healer)

Now, with three people in your party at a time, you have the option to set up six different "paradigms". A paradigm is set of three of these roles. For example, Commando, Ravager, Ravager is your all out offense paradigm. Medic, Medic, Sentinel is a defense and recover paradigm and so on. You can swap your paradigms as often as you want within a battle without penalty. For the first few hours, you can get by just switching between offense and healing paradigms, but later you must get much more strategic about which paradigms you use. Some battles that seem impossible can be easily beaten with pattern recognition and proper paradigm choices. So those are your paradigms.

Strategery.

When you actually start attacking, the default selection is "Auto Battle". You have an Active Time Battle gauge that has to fill up before you attack. This gauge is segmented into different pieces which you can increase the number of as you level up. So let's say you have four segements in your bar and you are set as a Commando. If you select "Auto Battle" you might see your ATB gauge fill up with "Attack" "Attack" "Attack" "Attack". Meaning you will attack four times. You can manually select your actions, and your tendency will be to do that at first, but you'll quickly learn to use the auto battle option. The battles occur so quickly that you will not have time to sit and think about which action to take. Fortunately, the AI that selects your actions is fairly intelligent. There are times - especially when you are a medic - that you are like "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU THINKING?!" but for the most part it's pretty good. So your main strategy comes from building the proper paradigms and then knowing when to swap to which one. So you become more of a strategist than a micromanager.

Segmented ATB Gauge.

The final, brilliant layer of the battle system is the Stagger system. Most enemies hit points will not deplete very much when you first start attacking, if at all. What is affected is the "stagger bar". This is a bar that gradually increases as you attack, but depletes while you aren't attacking. Once it fills up, your enemies are EXTREMELY vulnerable, but the stagger bar also begins depleting rapidly once it's full. This serves as a "countdown". During this 30-45 seconds you have to unload everything you have to try to take as much HP from your enemy as possible. So the first goal of every battle is to stagger your enemy. This can get difficult when your enemy doles out devastating attacks that require constant healing. But it's this back and forth madness that really makes the battle system exciting.

Stagger bar in the top right, health bar above the flying dragon thingy.

Overall, the best thing about the battle system is that you actually feel like you get better at it over time. It is a skill that takes practice and is extremely rewarding when you're firing on all cylinders. It's almost like when you finally get going in Guitar Hero and your fingers seem to be moving on their own. You will end up really impressing yourself. 

Additional Things I Enjoyed

• Save points are frequent - like every five minutes. This is a godsend for busy people who only have a 20 or 30 minutes to play at a time. Ahem. Lost Odyssey.
• Even with this save point miracle, you aren't pushed back to a save point after losing a battle. You are given the option to retry the battle right where you started. This seems like there's no penalty for losing, but there is still a lot of frustration when you die in battle. Some enemies can take up to 15 minutes to beat - so if you die right before you send him into stagger mode at 14 minutes in - it can devastate you. 
• All cutscenes are skippable. Even the first time you view them. I watched all of them, and can confidently tell you not to feel bad about skipping any of them - you're not missing much. 
• When you load a save file you are given a summary of the most recent events in the story while the game loads. This is great if you are someone who takes long breaks from a game and forgets what was happening in the story. This little feature also reveals additional details about the story that aren't explained very well in cutscenes. 
• The graphics are freaking gorgeous.

Additional Things I Hated

•  Voice acting/direction. The voice actors are OK by video game standards, but too often they fall into stereotypical niches and respond in unrealistic ways. Lightning (the girl on the cover) and Sazh (the black dude) are the best and most believable characters. Vanille however, may be the worst acted character ever in a video game. Her reaction in every situation is completely disconnected from reality. She's sickeningly positive. Like, after watching the slaughter of dozens of people she just gleefully says "It will be alright." She will make you want to chew shards of glass to relieve yourself from her stupid outlook on life. 
• Lack of RPG standard fare. No towns. No mini games. No exploration. Walk fight repeat. It gets old. 
• Weapon upgrade system. It's really the only distraction from fighting, and it's never explained how to take advantage of it. I ended up just pouring my resources into upgrading my final party's weapons not knowing if what I was doing was good or not.
• It takes about 20 hours to "get going". Many reviewers have complained about this, and I am no different. The first 1/3 of the game is EXTREMELY slow, usually only allowing you two characters at a time. Fortunately this is when the story is most interesting. After 20 hours you are finally given the ability to choose your party, and after 30 you can actually grind if you want. Imagine that.  
• It's linear. Another common complaint amongst reviewers. There are beautiful settings and places designed by the artists at Square Enix, and you are restricted to walk through them in a singular narrow corridor. One of my favorite things to do in RPGs is just walk around and see what the artists created. There is no opportunity to do this in FF13. And it's a shame.
• Vanille again. I hate her so much. 

THIS is Vanille. 

So that's it. I don't want to give it a score. I liked it. I would ultimately recommend it to a friend, based solely on the fact of having them experience the battle system. But will it hold up as a classic to be remembered years later? Probably not. 

10 Words or Less Summary
Battle system is great. Everything else isn't.

One game down. Eighty-six to go...

Finished: Final Fantasy XIII

I did it.

Final Hour Count: 54:38
Final Team: Lightning, Fang, Hope
Final Paradigm Deck: Relentless Assault, Diversity, Combat Clinic, Evened Odds, Delta Attack, Mystic Tower

Still Playing...FFXIII

Current Chapter: 12
Hour Count: 50
Estimated Remaining Time: 5-10 Hours

All the leveling I did back when I first landed on Gran Pulse has paid off. Boss battles, while still challenging, don't require as much controller spiking as battles like the one against Cid Raines. Also, there's these huge elephant turtle things walking around on Gran Pulse that could kill my entire party in one move back when I was there, and now in Chapter 12 I was forced to fight one and was actually beat it. That, for me, is one of the greatest pleasures of playing an RPG: being able to beat an enemy that seemed previously impossible to beat, and it felt great!

Overall, I'm getting ready to move on. This long, tedious task of playing only one game at a time is worsened when it's a 60 hour RPG. There are a few RPGs like this in my collection, like Kingdom Hearts 2 and Grandia II, that will probably slow me down big time when I get to them. But after FFXIII, I am looking forward to taking down games a little more rapidly, so I will likely move onto a few NES games for a while. Hopefully, with practice, I can beat most of those in about a week.